The Plastic Monster

I spent some time yesterday straightening up the house. When I say some time, I may in actuality be talking about hours on top of hours. Now, the normal person would think that as a result I have a spic and span house, shiny and sparkly from top to bottom. Unless you have ever dealt with small children. If you have dealt with small children you are now thinking to yourself, Oh, it must be the plastic monster that kept her so occupied.

Yes, the plastic monster has invaded my house, threw up everything he ate (which naturally, is plastic) and then spit it out in my living room, my kitchen, my bedroom, my office, my basement, my unmentionables drawer. Yes. My underwear drawer. He’s a pervasive bugger that guy.

It doesn’t help that this monster is invited, WELCOMED really, into my house by my three almost to be four year old daughter. Oh, she loves him so. We’ve battled him since she was born and will continue to do so.

My confrontation yesterday culminated in one Target sized bag that I managed to sneak out of the house like a smuggler sneaking vegetables into Candy Land.

Until we meet again my adversary, I will continue to pluck princesses out of my underwear drawer. Which of course are there because it’s where they can “sit in the boats.”




6 thoughts on “The Plastic Monster

  1. Kim, You know what I LOVE about this? It is exactly as you would tell it – in YOUR voice! I can even see the arm movements and the facial expressions you would be making while telling this story. And yet, it is written. What an extremely important skill to teach out kids – how to write out what they say – in prose.

  2. Very funny. I really enjoyed reading your post especially line about the plastic bags snuck out of the house like a smuggler. Brings back memories.

  3. The sad thing is the Plastic Monster is invited in. By us. 13 and 15 yr old boys and the Plastic Monster is still a staple. I’d take a picture but I’m too embarrassed. 😉

  4. I love this piece, Kim! I am also living it right now. Today I tried to get Audrey to put some of her stuffed animals in a bag to donate ( We seems to have a million, she plays with 2). Yeah, right! I might resort to the sneaking them out approach, they are driving me crazy.

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